# 9

I walked into Chennai Central at 8 pm almost 15 years since I had last sat foot in the Railway Station. My friends and I were on our way to attend a marriage. The station was abuzz with activity as I walked in throught the metal detactor.

The only inactive person was the security guard at the entrance watching the throng indifferently. Untill I walked in.

He called on me to check my bags.

Having pretended to check them he went back to his indifferent approach to all other passengers. 

# 10

A very close friend of mine M- spent more than a  miserable year in a relationship with a guy who was beneath her. Literally beneath her. He spent the year feeding her insecurities and his ego almost on the verge of being abusive.

She let him.
She let him because she honestly believed she deserved it for putting her previous boyfriend (who happened to be incredible to her) through her father’s open disgrace. A stigma we small town girls have suffered for ages.

She truly believed her current misfortune was due to her past sins and she must endure it.
I found it ridiculous. It was.

We are educated woman. But there are so many of us who has concocted the most preposterous reasons to hold on when we should have long let gone.

# 11

Me: You know, if the Mayans got it right I am gonna die before you coz I am 12.5 hours ahead of you.  What would you do for the 12.5 hours?
You: I would look at your photos and relive all our times together till I meet the same fate in 12.5 hours.

I wept.
Corny may be. But I wept.
Promise me. Promise me you will find me in our next life and this time it would be forever.


# 12

Many winters ago I had negotiated a No-questions-asked-fortnight with my mom. I would top my class and she would let me do as I please for the winter break before my next school year.
For my ten year old self it meant not eating my vegetables, no lights out time, reading as many comic books as I wanted and not having to attend the infinitely boring dinners with my parents’ colleagues.

Free will is my favourite thing about being human. And I had learnt to appreciate it early on in my life.

Yet I spent half my life bound by the wishes of someone I thought was the one. It was I who allowed him next to limitless power to run my life for fear of losing him.

A realisation that has dawned on me much too late. Perhaps it would have been kinder if I had lived my life not knowing.

# 13

3 years back this time I spent days worrying to get a transfer to Kolkata. 

Today, I m picking my stamped passport to USA.

How life has changed and I have too along with it. I was trying to be closer to home then and now I m fleeing in the opposite direction... 

But some things never change. It was always my heart that I was trying to follow. That and the fact that I m still in Chennai !

Hello. Anyone listening to my prayers?

# 15

If I were a painting, I would be a sky-scape. Of a lone kite in the deepest red floating across the brilliantly blue sky. Untouched by the chaos in the land below. Free to float where it wills.

Our alter ego is always something which we canNOT have.